Topic: Okay, medium length essay, wondering if anyone would proof read for me? Points + best answer to first answer!?
July 18, 2019 / By Neas Question:
So i wrote an essay on why NOT to watch TV for my LA class, and I was wondering if anyone else would proof read it for me? Really grateful, point best answer ect for first complete response!
:Lorium Ipsum -what?- due to teens and adults choosing to watch TV over reading a book, no one reads anymore anyway.
TV has been in vast demand since the 1950-60’s when it first became a big hit with the public, now 40% of families have 3 TV’s in their household.
TV is domination today’s society, so why not try turning it off, just for a
For a start, watching TV correlates with poor health, weight gain, and low energy levels [Simplemom.net]. Yet many parents/guardians are fine with their children sitting down and watching hours of it- leaving little time for school-work, or exercise.
You may say that many children are Kinetic learners-meaning they learn best by ,for example, watching an educational TV program about a subject.
Should these children have to struggle with learning just because they can only do it in a different way then others?
But then, if you’re saying your child should be able to watch educational TV,
why is to much TV stereotyped [rightly] to bad grades, and why are they watching Disney channel rather then TLC?
Television also conveys the idea that violence is okay to small and subjectable children.
We see young children running around, using their hands as toy guns, one being the baddy and the other a cop, but where do they get these ideas from? It may seem innocent at the time, and as most children do it we assume it’s normal for them to pretend to be a criminal, but they grow up thinking it’s perfectly okay to stroll into a bank with a gun and act like their favourite TV hero. It’s not.
Where do you think they’re getting these ideas from? Speaking from experience (yes, that’s right, all 13 years of it[!]) most of the swear words, adult jokes/references and information that many parents wouldn’t want their child to know, comes from what I’ve seen on TV.
It’s true for most adolescents and teenagers.
Many would say “we’ll just monitor what our child sees on TV!” but why aren’t you already?!
G. Bush once said “We have an off button for a reason.[To] turn TV off…” When giving a speech about TV and it’s effect on youth.
And lastly, it slows down your brain activity.
Yes, I know we already talked briefly about education in the fist paragraph but I’m here to educate you some more! There’s a reason why they say “couch potato”,excessive TV watching turns your head into a figurative potato in over time. Research has shown that when you are watching TV, your higher brain regions shut down[Opiate of the Masses]. Your lower brain is set in a “fight or flight” response mode. Over, your higher brain regions experience atrophy due to lack of usage. Studies have shown that TV children watching TV can lead to a low attention span.
Of course, they are all however, only opinions and facts.
The only thing that you can do is turn of the TV for only one week!
That’s it! That’s all you have to do, no “I’m never going to watch TV again!” [because let’s face it, it’s simply not true and the prospect is daunting]
So just boycott it for one week with us!
Save a couple hundred brain cells, who knows, maybe you’ll like it?
Keshaun | 10 days ago
Don't say "for a start" and "lastly" your paragraphs should flow smoothly and you should transition better than simple introductory phrases.
Books transform your life sentence structure, reading level, spelling, vocabulary, and generally are more educational than T.V.
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Really really good!!! Why not try to make a little less paragraphs and make it look longer but other than that I loved it!!!!! :)