My husband has a boss that doesn't care about employee's family life outside the company? How do we handle?
Topic: My husband has a boss that doesn't care about employee's family life outside the company? How do we handle?
June 20, 2019 / By Bettie Question:
My 10 year anniversary is in a couple of weeks and my husband and I were trying to plan something nice to do. I asked him to take a half day off work, as I only have to work a half day myself. The company my husband works for is remodeling a new facility to move their current business to. When my husband approached his boss about taking the half day off, he was informed that they would be moving the offices that weekend. He asked his boss to talk to his dad (who owns the company) to see if they would put off the move until the following weekend. His boss said he would talk to the dad, but apparently it didn't matter. The dad said they were moving that weekend. This dad doesn't care about anything but making money. His employees lives outside the company doesn't matter to him. When someone gives notice he just tells them to go ahead and leave...they don't need them any longer. My family comes first and I told my husband he needed to go to the dad and tell him that this is a very important day and he really needs to day off and would really appreciate him moving the move to the next weekend. So far it doesn't matter. This guy just doesn't care about anyone but himself. How do we handle this situation? It isn't like it is just our 3rd or 7th anniversary...it is our 10 year. That is a big milestone nowadays and I want to celebrate it. Is that too much to ask? A little common decency would go a long way with this person.
Man...you people are heartless. Apparently a milestone such as this isn't reached much these days so none of you people would understand the importance of such a date!!! I can appreciate that the business needs to handle the business, but life happens too. I asked for advice on how to "handle the situation", not for criticism on how I feel about it. I am smart enough to know that the company doesn't "have" to do anything. That doesn't mean I don't have a right to be upset about it. I hope none of you people need good advice on how to handle something because most of you sure don't know how to give it. NEGATIVE comments is all I have received from all but 1 person. Thanks Paul for your compassion. I appreciate your comments.
Best Answers: My husband has a boss that doesn't care about employee's family life outside the company? How do we handle?
Aideen | 8 days ago
I understand your feelings but do you really think a business can or should put off a major move just for one person?
You and your husband may need to just go out to dinner and then the following weekend do something nice.
👍 104 | 👎 8
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Originally Answered: My husband's boss doesn't want him to be with me when I have the baby?
Absolutely NOT. It is LAW that the husband can be off work with his wife / partner whilst she gives birth - and usually for a few weeks after that.
He has paternal rights. Tell him to mention to his boss that he is seeking legal advice on the matter.
The boss will crap himself and suddenly be fine with it.
The boss needs a kick in the nuts. It's none of his bloody business.
Good luck to you and your 'new arrival' x
Well sweetie - I'll say this much - while I agree with you about wanting to do something special for your 10th anniversary (Congratulations, by the way) - what you are asking your husbands boss to do is put a hold on a business move. From what you describe, the company is moving from point A to point B. There are a lot of logistics and personnel involved, not to mention the cost....and you want them to put it off for a week so you and the Mr. can enjoy a 1/2 day off. So from a business standpoint, your request is unreasonable. From your viewpoint, your hubby's company is being unreasonable.
Like I said, I agree with your reason for wanting some special time with your husband on your 10th anniversary, but I'm sure the company owner did not plan this specifically with the plan of ruining your anniversary. Some things just happen this way and there isn't much to do about it except change your plans. When your husband comes home from the move, make it a special evening for the 2 of you. Sure, you couldn't do what you originally planned, but that doesn't mean you can't enjoy what little time you DO have - right? Make it special and let go of your irritation at your husbands company. Besides, there are more important things to think about - yes?
👍 30 | 👎 1
Honestly it is way to much to ask. I doubt this company planned last minute to move things around during a move, this must of been planned for a while and maybe your hubby knew about it and it might of slipped his mind.
As a single parent who has made many sacrifices in the workplace, i find it insulting that people think their employers should all be new age. Your not always going to make it to your child's ballgame or have that romantic dinner with your loved one because you have to work. Why cant u just move your celebration to a day when u both have off? Your hubby has a job, now a days that's something to celebrate too. Im sorry if i sound harsh, but that's just the way it is,
👍 23 | 👎 -6
The man doesn't care or need to care about anyone's life outside the company, he doesn't pay them for that. You're asking an entire company to put off a planned (and very expensive move) for your personal celebration.
He should have simply asked for a day's vacation and left it at that. Unless everyone was told they could take no days off during this move, he could easily take a vacation day. If he has to work he has to work, you'll have to accommodate that in your schedule for your anniversary celebration. It's not like your marriage is going anywhere if you've been married that long.
👍 16 | 👎 -13
His boss is within his rights to expect your husband to work. They shouldn't have to stop their plans to move the office just because you are having an anniversary. This is just how the real world works. If your husband can't get time off, celebrate on another day. If your husband wants a job with more flexible hours, then he should start looking for a new one. Getting angry about something you can't change isn't going to help your situation.
👍 9 | 👎 -20
A business has no reason to accommodate such a request during such a time -- or any other time, for that matter -- and you are not reasonable to expect that. If you want a business to care about the employees' personal lives and adjust business activities to accommodate non-business matters you will have to form your own business. In the event you push this issue, with many businesses it will put your husband's job in jeopardy. Choose another time to celebrate.
👍 2 | 👎 -27
Your husband signed a contract with the company to work when he was scheduled to work. If he doesn't want the job and the responsibility that comes with it then he should quit.
👍 -5 | 👎 -34
Originally Answered: My husband doesn't take care of his son (my step). I have to be the primary caregiver. What should I do?
I'm going to be rather blunt and get to the pith here.
I will assume three things (pls correct me if I am wrong).
1) you had some idea when you married this man that his son whom he has joint custody with has special needs (one of which is on the autism spectrum - a disability that is known for tearing families apart).
2)some part of his break up had to do with his son's disability (90% divorce rate for families with a child on the autism spectrum).
3) you have two children with him, so you have been with him at least more than a year - so this has been going on for awhile.
A woman who marries a man with children should assume she will have to take a nurturing role, especially if he has joint or full custody.
You have allowed him to not care for his son, you can try to counter this by not caring for him. This will most likely lead to your husband being discontent because this is how he escapes from the reality of his son's disability, and his son not getting proper care while at your home. Which will lead to even more problems as the child's behavior deteriorate. Did he help his previous wife?
You are in an untenable position, sadly one you should have seen coming. I wish you the best but sincerely see hard times ahead.
My advice to you, speak to your husband about his lack of care-giving (I hope I am wrong, but I don't think he will be too accomadating). Get ready for a long seige. Don't stop caring for your step-son, unless you are willing for things to get worse (and don't care that he is suffering). You can always try getting out of the house with you two normal children and leave you husband and son for some "quality time."
I am sure your family dynamics are much happier when you step-son is not there . . . sadly the vast majority of families with mod - severe autism could say the same.
Lastly you can do what a vast majority of biological parents do . . . cut and run.