HELP!, i tried having sex and i couldnt get it up?
Topic: HELP!, i tried having sex and i couldnt get it up?
July 20, 2019 / By Catharine Question:
so yes i do watch porn everyday but i dont know if that was it, i was with a friend and before i know it my pants were down, i had a erection and then once it came time for sex i lost it fast or it wouldnt go as hard as it did and i was shaking like i was FREEZING, also i am only about 17 if age was a curious factor, how can i solve this that was my first time, my partner even tried sucking it and a handjob and that didnt do the trick...please help i am so embarrased/angry
Best Answers: HELP!, i tried having sex and i couldnt get it up?
Annabeth | 8 days ago
above posters are all retarded....you're saying if he was with a girl then he's gay, if he was with a guy...hes straight?? omfg
1. was it a guy or girl?
2. was it with a condom?
3. was it anal?
4. were you nervous about someone walking in/catching you?
5. were you drunk/stoned?
if you can answwer these would be a help. Dont be embarassed, msot erection problems are mental, not physical, especially if you're able to masturbate.
👍 204 | 👎 8
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Originally Answered: What would you do if you couldnt be sober for more than one day?
I can related to exactly what you're going through right now. I am also an addict and have been for 15 years, and for at least 13 or those years it was entirely my own 'dirty little secret'. No-one knew because like you I was an incredibly good liar and was able to hide it. I think there was a part of me that on some level denied my problem and therefore I was also hiding it from me. Sound familiar?
My secret was uncovered 10 months ago, by everyone, my Mum and my best friend, my boyfriend. I was incredibly embarrassed and ashamed at what I'd done to myself and worried about what they were thinking about me, but more than that it was such a HUGE relief, and I felt such a weight lifted from me. I can only say I think if you intend for your marriage to continue and want that he certainly needs to know. How exactly you go about doing that only you can answer, I wish you luck and can truly say the relief you'll feel when you tell could even solve the problem of your using altogether.
Performance Anxiety! You got nervous, it used to happen to me for along time. I couldn't get it up once and it ruined me for the longest time. The thing that helped me the best was 1. have a supportive gf to help me through it, talk the girl about it very embarrassing trust me I know. 2. You just have to relax, take some deep breathes when your in that position and think positive 3. get viagra to give you a little crutch to help out sample pack should be all you need 4. Be in a comfortable place where your not in a hurry, and do not expect so much out of yourself, it happens to guys all the time. They just have to work through it. I went through the exact same thing. It took me a couple times to get through it completely to, but afterwards I felt so much better and I do not have a problem anymore. Check out this page, it will give more explanation about it as well.
👍 80 | 👎 1
Porn usualy has guys and girls. If only a girl was there and she gave you a *******/handjob and you STILL did not get up. Your definitly homosexual. Try looking up some gay porn and seeing if you get aroused. More then likely your just homosexual. Or then you cummed extremely early. For the record I watched porn dailey till I was 22 masterbating constantly. The first time I had sex couldn't get my penis to go dearoused for 7 plus hours. Porn does not make it so you don't get aroused...
👍 73 | 👎 -6
It's all mental, you just choked, too much other stuff on your mind. Was your partner a female, that would sure be a plus. Some dude working on the yang is a real turnoff.
👍 66 | 👎 -13
umm, you can't solve it yourself. obviously not, as you havent done such a good job of it in 1.5 years of marriage. you need to have a serious talk with your wife and a medical consultation needs to happen. do you want to live in a sexless marriage? that is where you are heading if you allow this to continue. i'm not saying that your wife is lying or anything like that...but you'd better work the problem before your sexual frustration kicks in and you have other issues.
👍 59 | 👎 -20
check it stop watching the porn everyday all thats going to do is tramatize yourself to perform. control youre breathing is the key and make sure you calm yourself down dont get to excited,once that happens youre in the game and 30 sec later youre done and she didnt even get started
👍 52 | 👎 -27
it sounds like you were nervous. next time don't think about trying so hard to get it up lol....just let it go. it could be that you need alot of foreplay to get really aroused...so try that. because it seems like it was a sudden thing that could be possibly why it didn't last long. you probably weren't ready physically or emotionally.
👍 45 | 👎 -34
Originally Answered: I couldnt take it pap smear?
FIrst of all, I will say that this happened to me. Don't feel bad. Although no one talks about it, it DOES happen for a variety of reasons. Not all women have an empowering first gyn exam, despite what we've been told.
Also, most virgins can have an internal exam; this isn't "normal." There are several possibilities. 1) you have vaginismus, at least situationally in the medical setting. Can you insert fingers or tampons? If you can't, it feels like a brick wall or like stabbing pains, then it's probably that. 2) You have a thick hymen (maybe the doc would see it?), 3) another sexual pain condition and 4) the doctor did something wrong and/or you weren't relaxed enough.
Honestly, right now don't worry about it. You don't need a gyn exam to get on birth control. If a doctor tries to give you a pap smear, then just explain to them what happened before and if your doctors are anything like mine, they will be horrified and won't want to give you a pap smear. (it's not necessary if you can't have intercourse either).
Also, Angel, that advice probably isn't so good. Having pap smear should not be excruciatingly painful or impossible in a 16+ year old women. Even if you are a virgin, your hymen is mostly broken at that point from tampons, biking, etc (unless you have an especially thick one). It might be a little bit more difficult but not like that. Anyway, if the problem is that she has vaginismus or Vulvodynia, sex, if it's possible, won't solve the problem. I have no idea if that's the case, but I don't want to spread misinformation around the web.